【娱乐向】一些技术段子 +《xkcd》—B_Z_B_Y

期末考试考完了，来放松一下 QvQ

看到自己新买的书上（《程序员的英语》别问我为什么买这本书）有这样的一篇有趣的文章就直接搬上来啦（：个别翻译我不是很理解 QAQ，所以有些不是很好懂）

另外《xkcd》真的是好有趣 qwq

正文开始

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1. Cars will soon have the Internet on the dashboard . I worry that this will distract me from texing.

汽车将很快在仪表板上安装互联网。我担心这会让我分心。

— Andy Borowitz

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2. “User” is the word used by the computer pofessional when they mean “idiot”.

“用户” 是计算机专家使用的词语，当他们表达 “傻子 “时。

–Dave Barry

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3. What dis people do when they went to bathroom before smart phones?

人们在智能手机发展之前会去厕所做些什么？

–Aaron Cobra Mervis

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4. Thanks to the Internet , people we might have only suspected of being idiots can now give us ample evidence.

多亏互联网，那些我们曾经怀疑是白痴的人现在可以给我们充分的证据。

–Andy Borowitz

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5. Technology is ruled by two types of people : those who manage what they do not understand , and those who understand what they do not manage .

技术由两类人支配着：那些管理这他们不理解的东西的人，以及那些理解他们不能管理的东西的人。

–Mike Trout

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6. Computers have enable people to make more mistakes faster thanalmost any invention in history, with the possible exception of tequila and hand guns.

除了龙舌兰酒和手枪之外，计算机使人们能够比历史上任何发明都更快地犯错误。

–Mitch Ratcliffe

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7. Treat your password like your toothbrush. Don’t let anybody else use it, ans get a new one every six months.

像牙刷一样对待你的密码。不要让任何人使用它，并且每六个月更新你的密码。

–Clifford Stoll

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8. I changed my password to ” incorrect” so whenever I forget what it is , the computer will say “you password is incorrect.”

–Unknown

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9. Facebook is the only place on the planet where it is acceptable to talk to a wall.

Facebook 是这个星球上唯一可以接受和墙对话的地方。

–Unknown

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10. I heard internet addition’s now an offical mental disorder and you can go to rehab for it .

#### Modern technology. Owes ecology. An apology.

我听说网络成瘾现在是一种官方的精神病，并且你可以去治疗。
现代科技。 欠生态学 。 一个道歉。

–Alan M.Eddison

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11. There are two ways of constructing a software design ; one way is to make it so simple that there are no deficiencies , and the other way is to make it so complicatesd that there are no obvious deficiencies. The first method is far more difficult.

构建软件设计有两种方法; 一种方法是使其变得如此简单以至于没有缺陷，另一种方法是使其变得如此复杂以至于没有明显的缺陷。但第一种方法要困难得多。

–C.A.R.Hoare

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12. Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far the Universe is Winning.

今天的编程是软件工程师努力建立更大和更易操作的程序，和宇宙尽力产生更大，更好的白痴之间的竞赛。到目前为止，宇宙一直在取胜。

–Rick Cook

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13. As IT professionals, we don’t solve your problems. We just change the nature of problems.

作为 IT 专业人士，我们无法解决您的问题。我们只是改变问题的本质。

–Unkown

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14. I invented it , Bill made it famous.

我发明了它，比尔使它成名。

–David Bradley(Wrote the code for Ctrl + Alt + Del on IBM PC ： 在 IBM PC 上 编写了 Ctrl + Alt + Del 代码)

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15. My software never has bugs . It just develps random features.

我的软件从来没有 Bug。它只是开发了随机功能罢了。

–Unknown

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16. I used to live an active life — I played football , tennis , dis car racing . Sometimes played poker and pool. But when my computer got stolen, everything ended.

我曾经过着积极的生活 – 踢足球，网球，赛车。 有时玩扑克和游泳池。但当我的电脑被盗时，一切都结束了。

–Unknown

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17. Unix is user-friendly. It’s just very selective about who its friends are.

Unix 是很容易使用的 。 只不过它是非常有选择性的 ，关于它的朋友是谁。

–Unknown